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July 19, 2008


and the posting is ... sparse.

I've been working as a teacher for the past 6 years and have just started to figure out this summer thing.  This is the first year I've done nothing during my break and its starting to show. My brain is relaxing to the point that if I come up with a 'great' idea and don't write it down or act on it right away, it's gone. I have had these little brain spurts in a store and before I got down to the aisle where the stuff is that I have just decided that I WILL DIE UNLESS I HAVE IT, I have forgotten what my idea was.

While this can be disconcerting, I'm just grateful that I'm actually having ideas again. This is a good sign. My brain has been stagnant since, well, since my surgery last year. I don't know what happened to me but I really feel like I have not been able to get caught up since then. Speaking of which...

I was talking to T today and it hit me ... this time last year I had just moved in here and was waiting to find out whether or not I had cancer again. I was sure this was it, that it was the supreme ironic twist that I knew was coming in my life, that once I found a fabulous guy that actually loved me and I finally bought my own house and got my life moving in the right direction that I was going to die and lose it all. I couldn't lift anything, I couldn't really DO anything but think ... and wait for a spot to open for surgery ... and think some more.

Yeah, last thing I needed was lots of time to think with no way to distract myself. It reminded me of when I was waiting for my (now) X to show up after he got served ... I don't think I slept for 2 months. 

After the surgery, I spent all my recovery energy getting back to work and I've been running flat out since. This is the first real break I've had and I think I'm finally loosening up. Hopefully, I can get creative and start writing again. Or drawing, how awesome would that be?

Baby steps. Today I tweet. Tomorrow, who knows. 

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This page contains a single entry by Prosemonkey published on July 19, 2008 4:39 PM.

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